This Cannot be Real!

I am turning eighteen in less than two weeks.

I will be a “legal” adult in exactly 11 days and 19 hours and 22 minutes.

This Cannot be Real!

Ever since I was little I have dreamed of and planned for the moment I would turn eighteen – the exact moment that would officially declare the passing of my childhood and the suddenly plopping of myself into the big scary world of grown-ups.

I imaged a full career dropped in my lap, a gorgeous house in the middle of the woods with a water fall in the back ground and a suitor knocking on my front door.

I have come to realize that all of those plans were totally false and had no bases in reality. Really I have no clue what the exact moment when I turn eighteen will look like. It is very possible that I could be doing something as simple and mundane as checking facebook, sleeping, or drinking way to much coffee.

I can basically promise you that I will not be wearing a beautiful blue rose patterned dress while prince charming declares his undying love for me.

I’m pretty sure that I will not be a full fledged, famous author or traveling the globe.

And short of a miracle I’m positive I will not have the fully furnished dream house in the woods somewhere surrounded by marvelous scenery.

In fact my life is quiet the opposite of all that.

AND THAT IS GREAT.

I love my life right now.

I’ve discovered that I don’t want that huge eighteenth birthday party I’ve always planned on throwing. I just want to spend some time laughing and smiling with my family.

I’ve found out that I don’t need a huge amazing career – I don’t even ever have to have one of my books published – so long as I am listening to the voice of my Savior and living life with him. All I need to do is my best.

I’ve realized that the house of my dreams is really right where my family is – and I don’t intend to leave it for good any time soon. I love my family and they have my heart. Home is definitely where your heart is.

And finally despite my most desperate pleas and most consuming desires I don’t have any special someone chasing after my affections. Rather I am enjoying a very special time of growing in patience and trust with my Lord and Leader, Jesus Christ. I am finding out so much about me and what real love is and it has nothing to do with riding off into the sun set.

There is only one thing I really want for my eighteenth birthday.

I just want to be smiling and laughing and surrounded by people who love me.

Because in the end that is all that matters.

Mothers day 2011
Mothers day 2011
My precious Aunty and I years and years ago <3
My precious Aunty and I years and years ago ❤
Besties for life! (in 2010)
Besties for life! (in 2010)
Bucca De Beppo with Youth Group 2013
Bucca De Beppo with Youth Group 2013
Blowing out the candles for sweet 16 (2012)
Blowing out the candles for sweet 16 (2012)
Summer 2013
Summer 2013
My dad and I going to the Purity Ball 2011
My dad and I going to the Purity Ball 2011
My grandparents and all my siblings 2013
My grandparents and all my siblings 2013
Homecoming 2013
Homecoming 2013
Halloween 2013
Halloween 2013
My first kiss lol 2012
My first kiss lol 2012
Me Ethan Seleah and Helena with my Grandma
Me Ethan Seleah and Helena with my Grandma
Me and Abby 2011
Me and Abby 2011
Regency 2013
Regency 2013

 

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2 thoughts on “This Cannot be Real!

  1. awesome post. If I’d had this type of presence of mind when I was your age….well, I might be a full time writer. 🙂 It is so important to enjoy where you are in the moment.

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